Espresso with my mentor within

Have you ever read a book that left such an impact that you couldn’t stop talking about it? For me, that book is Playing Big by Tara Mohr.

In her book, Mohr coined the term “inner mentor” although she originally learned about this concept at the Coaches Training Institute, who call the visualization exercise “future self.” Since reading this book and learning about the “inner mentor,” it is hard for me to have a conversation without talking about my experience sitting down with my inner mentor, who is me 20 years from now.

Being able to meet my inner mentor was challenging. I tried about seven times and was unsuccessful each time. It was so difficult that I even fell asleep several times during the visualization exercise. My wife had met her inner mentor and I was determined to meet mine as well because I could see how the experience had changed my wife’s outlook. One night, I asked my wife to read Mohr’s visualization passage aloud but to change every feminine reference to a masculine one and that did the trick.

The experience started with me walking up to his house; he lived in a nice place and I could smell the ocean. He warmly greeted me and prepared a couple of espresso shots that we enjoyed in his spacious office. He asked me to call him Gerard. I then asked him a few questions about what I needed to do to succeed. He responded that I needed to stay strong and confident. At the end of our conversation, he presented me with a beautiful watch.

When I came out of the visualization there was a tear rolling down my face. The experience gave me a clearer vision of what my future looks like and what I need to do to get there. I felt reassured and extremely empowered because I now knew that all the answers were within me. And who knows myself better than I do?

I still tap into the expertise of external mentors because their insight is invaluable, but I also allow my inner mentor to guide me as well. When faced with a difficult decision, I ask myself what decisions my inner mentor would make as well as look for guidance from my external mentors.

Even though Mohr’s book is written for women, it is relevant and applicable to men. Once you meet yourself 20 years from now – everything changes.